Dont read about this guy if youve eaten recently

http://www.dallasnews.com/lifestyles/headlines/20140321-true-romance-the-yellow-umbrella-was-a-sign-that-these-two-would-end-up-together.ece

WOW. I guess the dmn runs stories like this occasionally.  There seriously needs to be a warning that unless you have the most simple mind on this earth you should absolutely not read this article at the risk of driving you to commit suicide.  I totally get it from the girls perspective here, like its kind of a big dick move for a girl to get married when theyre young because it shows that theyve already figured out how to trick a guy into thinking theyre worth sacrificing the rest of his life, so kudos to len. Girls are all insecure about themselves at that age because they think theyre gross (probably are), gaining weight (definitely are), and getting uglier everyday (will be soon), but not len, she found a chump to put a ring on it.  But Austin, wtf man? I know baylor is a whacky school and all and you probably never saw a cunt hair before the day you married her but c’mon. Parents setting you up at a wedding? proposing at your elementary school? Singing taylor swift when you propose? “geeky” wedding? I just wish you would have lived a little. R.I.P. I guess.

Almost forgot- AUSTIN, PLEASE DONT SIT ON THE COUCH LIKE THAT, YOURE FREAKING ME THE FUCK OUT MAN!

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